This is a dumb story. A dumb, annoying story. A dumb, annoying, longer-than-it-should-have-been story. A dumb, annoying, longer-than-it-should-have-been-story about a chair. You ready for this rollercoaster ride of excitement? I’m a simple man with simple desires. I want to eat cool foods, watch great movies, and for my puppy to grow out of his puppy phase…